Life is a roller coaster we take the good with the bad and hope for the best results possible. But what if youre stuck in a whirlwind not knowing how to stop it.
Currently im dealing with angels and demons, the demons i dont want to discuss but if i dont they will rip me to shreds. The angels on the other hand wil know who they are when they read this. They are my support system and chosen family. If it wasnt for their love, caring and strength to stand behind me i would surly fall to the darkest of depths.
i am me, love me or hate me, there really is no in between.
ive been through a ton of shit over the past year and at times its taken me to the darkest of places, im ways im rebounding from it but in other ways i must admit i like the dark. ive always been some what of a risk taker and for me the more extreme the more i like it. When i talk of dark im talking of blood, vampirism, pain , cutting and of course anything that stings. i thrive off of that kind of thing. i never thought i would get this way but life has taken me there and its there that i thrive at my best.
ive been through a lot of hell in my life, i dont want to go into deatils as all of that will be in my upcoming book and i dont want to ruin it but lest just suffice to say that many who have been through what i have may not have made it this far. Have i ever tried to take my life because i was pushed too close to the edge?? Yes, a few times in fact and honestly i fight that thought almost everyday. The open wounds that i carry make it hard not to think that way. Some day i hope my wounds heal but in order for that to happen i need to make many changes, changes that in fact ive already started. This is the new beginning of my life and im trying to make the most of it but the adjustment has been tough so far but i think that once i make a few more adjustments ill get where i need to be.
People dont understand me and i dont ask to be understood, just accepted for who i am. The angels in my life are both in human form and a little canine who is always at my side. i couldnt ask for a better more level headed support system. They all try and keep me safe, being who i am sometimes i dont know how to do that myself so the help is not only needed but also dearly appreciated.
So, to sum it all up im fighting many things but i think if i can just hang in there all of it can be combines, the demons and angels, leaving the negative demons out and i can learn to thrive once again.
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